New Arrival

Just a quick update, our beautiful baby made a smooth entrance to our family on Sunday 16th September at 5:31am.

We are both doing brilliantly and finding our feet with each other.

So for those who guessed boy............... you were mistaken! Isabelle Jane weighed a healthy 8lb 6oz and is a delight.

I will be taking a break for as long as it takes until I feel I can add the blog to our new life. With regards to my previous post about how much I share of her with the internet the jury is still out! At the moment I want to keep her very much to myself :D

Weeks 39 - 40

Here is to hoping I don't get to week 41 or a dreaded week 42!

My 5th week at home was week 40, I was hopeful that baby would arrive sooner rather than later and that by now we would be adapting to a new life!

That said I guess my baby needs some extra cooking time and I am certainly not going to do anything to upset this babe.

39 weeks - having to wear my maternity clothes pretty much exclusively now

40 weeks - and fed up!

I was hoping not to even quite reach 40 weeks - more have a surprise instead of a waiting game.

Blessed

*Another one of those personal posts that I share because I feel like its my therapy. I was reading this blog when I realised how much progress I have made in myself and I feel like when I get my blog made into keepsake books I want to remember patience and perseverance paid off!*

I have written here before about PCOS and how I felt about that - being a 20 year old relatively newly wed discovering having children might require medical assistance, dealing with my own personal feelings about all of that side of things. But really just how I felt complete and incomplete at exactly the same time.

Andy and I are made for us, by whatever force that is - God, Spiritual or fate. Whatever, Andy and I are just custom made for each other.

So when I fell pregnant in January and we started this whole new journey together I wasn't sure how to feel. Sounds crazy because having children was always on the cards for us, having children young was also very likely to be on the cards for us seen as we were married at 19. But this bit was supposed to be difficult, I varied between feeling scared and completely in awe of being pregnant.

Throughout my pregnancy I have talked about feeling ungrateful for this blessing I am carrying because its hard work. It is still hard work and I don't believe I will look back on my pregnancy with completely rose tinted glasses and say I loved it, but I love our child and that's what has made me realise as hard as it has been at times, I would do it all over again. I would change things, I would change my attitude towards certain aspects (!!) but when we finally meet our baby I know I would do it all over again and more if that was necessary.

How do I not feel completely overwhelmed by that?! I don't know, this acceptance just sits better than the guilt I have felt. Past tense now thank fully. It was a part of the process for me. Now I am ready to share so much more with Andy and experience a whole new aspect of our relationship and personalities. I am excited for christmas as a family of three, I am excited just to be a family of three! I know that whatever is coming its how it should be and I am so, so happy to be at this stage in my life.

Weeks 35 - 38

I have been enjoying the last 3 weeks of maternity leave, I can feel my belly changing shape and moving down lower. At my last midwife appointment I was told that baby was 2/5 engaged - I was really excited because first time babies don't usually come out from being engaged! I have been getting dinners frozen, house tidied and just the crafty bits I wanted to make time for done.

Luckily enough for me, I even got to have another scan to check the position of the baby for the home birth. The heart and spine were so clear it was unreal! There is such a massive difference between each scan that having one this late in my pregnancy showed an actual baby.... not like the little bean of 12 weeks. Chubbier than the little human at 20 weeks.

This week is my 38 week appointment so I am excited to know what is happening.It could be anytime now!! I am hoping its any time from September (to do with schooling in the UK)

But you will probably see things slow down a little around this space whilst I take some guilt free time away from everything and meet this mister or miss! I have things planned and obviously you can follow my instagram @njk12.

35 weeks - resting my swollen feet

36 weeks - daddy having some tummy time

37 weeks - full term! And feeling it

38 weeks - just looking forward to being able to bend again

So what do you think girl or boy?!

My latest interests #7

You may have noticed a few changes going on around here recently, as part of my initial time out from work before baby I wanted to get this space a bit more established and interesting to read really :)

Anyway in all my exploring these last few weeks these are some things I am liking:

• These mugs might be being made into a gift for someone as a christmas present this year. Just got to start collecting the bits and pieces :)
• Some poignant information to bare in mind for my labour - which could be any day now that I am considered full term!
• I always seem to be thinking about food.... not sure what that says about me!!! I think I would adapt this recipe a little so that it didn't contain as much sugar because I am a picker I just like to have little bits of things. 
• I really love this belt idea, with an expanding waist line sometimes I want the definition but not the tightness of an elasticated waist - at least with this if I was having a particularly big day I could accommodate it!!
• My  FREE button swap is also doing well which makes me super happy! I still have places though if anyone is thinking about taking part in a swap :)

Maternity photo's

My sister from improvised intentions was a little gem this week, she got Andy and I motivated to take some maternity photos.

Stacey took A level photography and always thinks about lighting, positioning etc so I think it turned out really well. Of course I look at the pictures and think eurgh, swollen feet and hands - puffy face. But I completely treasure the memory of taking the photos and how happy we look in them.

I have put one in a frame because I just couldn't not to be honest!!

I feel so blessed when I look at this picture, I am not sure our baby could be more wanted or treasured by his/her daddy and mummy, but especially daddy. He has such a big heart, he really is my favourite <3 p="p">

Weeks 30 - 34

Well I finish work next week, a very bitter sweet time for me. Although I will not miss getting up everyday and I am looking forward to having a little bit of time to myself before the baby arrives. I have a few projects to finish up for the nursery and a new baby toy series I want to work on as well as spending time with Andy.

For the most part I am planning on tidying the house, readying the baby things, getting my hospital bag really ready, cooking some dinners to freeze for our first week at home, seeing friends and sleeping as much as I can! So many people have said to me the sleep deprivation that takes place throughout pregnancy is preparation for a new born that doesn't sleep routinely instantly!

Anyway, this is my progress so far:
30 weeks                                                  31 weeks                                    32 weeks

  

33 weeks                                                                       34 weeks

A very rare full body picture!                                I am really struggling to wear non-maternity clothes now

Nursery Series - 4. Crochet heart garland

As part of my nursery series I have already shown how I make the hearts. This garland is really simple and yet super sweet.

I chose to use 2 colours of hearts.

  

Then I added a darker brown crochet chain to pull the garland together. I started with 40 single crochets and then added the heart, in between each peak create 3 single crochets. Once the heart is on I used a space of 12 single crochets between each piece.

The finished project looks so good, I am so pleased with it. This one isn't for my nursery but a friends. For our nursery I used grey, yellow and green with a brown chain. 

Bringing up a baby through attachment parenting ...Some ideas

I guess I have hit that part of my pregnancy where I am trying to create an environment and attitude that really suits our baby and who we are as a couple as well as parents. I want prints around our home that encourage independence, choices, problem solving, knowing and staying true to yourself. I want happy pictures around that remind us why we do things.

I want to raise our children to be secure in themselves and the attachments they have with us. This is what made me think about discipline and when I read this article on Natalie's blog I began to think even more about our baby as a child and how we were going to fulfill all of our ambitions for our child.

I want Andy as involved as possible, at some point the plan is he will be the only one working and I will be at home with our children. How do I keep him involved and developing strong attachments with them? So I started to research how best to start the attachment process and how important certain things are. This website has  a range of information on attachment but not how to develop it. A good starting point.

Attachmentparenting.org has some good information for birth plans and how to develop your own ideas into how the after care could be. Birthinternational.com also has a lot of good information on breastfeeding and the most natural way of starting out.

I think the main concept I have discovered and will have to raise with Andy soon is how much I want to be lead by our baby. I want to rely on our instincts - the closeness after birth and letting the baby tell us when he needs attention. But balancing that with our needs to hold and get to know our new little person, by using eye contact and voices, touch and singing.

I have also come to the conclusion that we need to start talking and singing with the baby a lot more in order for the baby to recognise our voices outside of the womb. I am quite confident that when Andy has his hands on the baby to feel the movements the movements stop because I relax and the baby relaxes, I am hoping that once the baby is born this is proven to me by the baby being content with Andy because he remembers the feelings I had.

Also its my sister's 21st birthday today, it would be really lovely if you could pop over and wish her a happy birthday!

Mental kick in the butt

I had a look at my blog this evening and I feel like I have been in a quite a negative place recently, this isn't really like me at all. And I don't like it...

So I am focusing myself into improving how I want to spend the final stages of my first pregnancy.

Sleep
Is something I am having to adjust to the most, I am not able to sleep through the night at the moment and I think this is really getting me down. I have decided I need to make a new routine and give myself time to switch off, think about how I am feeling/inspired by/wants/new interests/things I need to remember before I attempt to sleep. This way I have written reminders, no rehearsing during my sleep of the things I don't want to forget and most importantly I have a plan for the blog!

Cold/Sinus issues
For whatever reason at the moment (Heyfever/flu) I have this insanely blocked nose that just doesn't let up! For someone who's sleep is being interrupted to also suffer through the day with her breathing is just cruel in my current condition!!!

Hip/Back pain
This is stopping me from doing a lot of my normal household duties as quickly as I want to. I am struggling to adapt to this way of life because I like things done my own way and in my own time. I have been getting very frustrated with not being 100% able. I need to slow down and accept this so that I can do the things I can do.

Being positive
Therefore, whilst progressing through these things I am deciding from now to be more positive and try harder to accept my current limitations. I think that for now this will help my attitude and general demeanor during the day. I might even get more sleep!

Stolen from my sister's blog

I couldn't help but share this first picture of Andy and I will our little bump (that's not so little at the moment!)

Stacey took the sneaky picture when we visited the Armed Forces Day on Plymouth Hoe Saturday 30th June. BTW where has this year gone?!

The baby didn't feel too happy with the loud planes flying around but it was nice to have some time with Andy and Stacey.

25 to 29 weeks

I cannot believe that Monday 2nd of July I will reach 30 weeks of pregnancy. I will be 3/4 of the way to bringing our first child into the world.

I am really feeling the weight of carrying this baby on my back and hips at the moment, but managing to stay as active as possible to keep myself mobile.

Fortunately I will have 7 weeks left of work (wooohooo!) I have been listening to my hypnobirthing CD and it definitely has a positive effect on me because the baby gets a right wriggle on... which is cute because as he is getting bigger so are the jerky movements of my tummy :) as much as it genuinely is hard work being pregnant those movements really make me appreciate the life growing away in there.

So what's the opinion then? Boy or Girl? We don't know and I am not sure what the majority vote is - at work its boy so maybe I should organise a sweep stake!!

Let me know your thoughts .............

Today is ...

For me, today is a day I have been looking forward to - just a change of scenery with some training, but at a hotel with a different set of people. I enjoy the sessions and I enjoy hearing from the group.

However, I had about 3 hours less sleep last night because of back ache and I just feel down now. Like I don't really have a lot to contribute. My eye lids are still heavy, my back still aching and I am uncomfortable.

At 29 weeks I am glad my sleep has lasted this long and I have my fingers and toes crossed that this was just a blip and that I will return to my normal sleep pattern soon. If not ....... I can just see the next 8 weeks being a little stressful. I don't function well with little sleep. I can be very impatient and in my job that isn't helpful.

On a positive note as I was awake early the baby seemed to be too - looks like I should get used to these early mornings! The only happiness I can take away from the baby being awake early mornings once he/she arrives is that at least I will be at home and able to not be polite to anyone as I will be mostly alone!! Or asleep when the baby is!! Which I definitely could do with today. Seems the baby wants to be awake between 3am and 5am but then will happily sleep until 9am this morning.

So sorry about the moan, I want to keep memories of this day just in case Andy ever says to me lets have a third or fourth child. :D

Stay at home in bed day

Today is one of those days I want to stay in bed and doze, do some leisurely house keeping maybe a little craft but really just take it easy.

I have woken up with a headache and heavy eye lids.

Little pea was awake at 1:30, wriggling away. And then again at 5:30 so it looks like I should get used to these early waking hours....

At 28 weeks I think we are doing well and possibly over this week I will know more about this little ones sleep and activity patterns. Which is quite exciting because I do feel like I am on even more of countdown now, having the baby wake me up and 'play' at 1:30 seems ok at the moment, its not ideal but feels so special.

All I know is today is a slow day where I will get done what I need to but in no pace. Apologies.

Fathers Day in an expectant household

My sister sent Andy a fathers day card a couple days early but his little face was such a picture :) he is going to be the proudest daddy ever.

We had quite a busy day doing the rounds and catching up on errands - HATE how quickly the weekends seem to be going by. It was nice catching up with everyone though. Life can get away from me sometimes and I forget how much I genuinely enjoy seeing family. That sounds mean but preparing for a baby takes up a lot of time at the moment and I am so tired after work that evenings are mainly recovery time! I really feel blessed for the amount of support we have around us - can be overwhelming, but I am sure it will come in handy once this baby arrives!!

So I treated myself this evening; catching up on my blogs, preparing myself blogging and writing wise to allow me some time off when things get too much. I have so much planned and in the works I am quite excited! I just wish I could write and create for this space all the day. The nursery would be further accessorized if I had the time....

I also found an interesting article about some of the things expectant mothers aren't always told - with some tips thrown in to actually deal with what it identifies. Luckily I think my mum had warned me about most of these..... I just can't imagine sitting still for 6 weeks or at least taking it easy.

On the same website I found some interesting discussion points surrounding discipline and the job we have signed ourselves up for. I love to read especially topics that I am sure will frustrate me if I have no knowledge of how I want to deal with it. Disciplining a child is a very controversial topic and whilst I do appreciate our parents knowledge I want to do things how Andy and I see fit, not just because 'it's what we did'.

I joined the library!

I am quite a restless soul and don't often just sit without doing something, I really enjoyed spending my summers off from school reading. Getting lost in some chick lit romance as I am a hopeless romantic!

So today after my midwife appointment today - measuring 26cm!! I popped to our local library and joined up. I was disappointed with the lack of selection of baby information books, the only one I could find was about breastfeeding so I did have to get it just to make sure I am as prepared as possible when baby arrives - anything I can do to make our adjustment a little easier or make myself feel more prepared I am up for doing whilst I can.

In addition to the breast feeding book I have a new read from Jill Mansell - major chick lit, pretty much the same foundation for each book but its always enough to take me off to a romantic dream!

Next time I visit the library I am hoping to find some books that Andy can read to the baby, we have one we read over and over but it would be nice to find some more! I hope to get our baby as enthusiastic about reading and learning as possible.

HypnoBirthing

So another surprising post about pregnancy!

I can't remember my original reasoning for looking into HypnoBirthing probably a moment of curiosity.

But ever since then I am hooked on the idea of what potential is within me to control my labor and embrace all aspects. I have always liked the idea of a medicine free labor where I could just progress and go with the flow so to speak. I think that the less intervention we have means a quicker recovery and adjustment to our new arrival.

Interestingly the Mongan method of HypnoBirthing was first introduced in 1989 (only the year I was born!) and is based on the work of an English physician that was first developed in 1933. The essence of the method is that fear draws blood away from the uterus making it unable to do its job effectively without pain. The 'pain' of childbirth is supposed to be a combination of fear, tension and ultimately the flight responses identified in the theory 'fight or flight'. Now, I must say at this point I am pregnant with my first child. Of course I am going to look for a solution to labor that gives me my desired outcome. As I only plan two labors in my life I figure this is my starting point because of my beliefs. This method suits me and I appreciate it will not suit everyone.

The biggest positive for me with respect to this idea is the involvement of your partner, I have been quite open with the fact I struggle keeping something that is about us to myself and whilst I appreciate my role at the moment, I love the idea of having Andy welcome our child into the world with a more hands approach. Through massage, keeping me focused through visualization techniques and knowing how I want things to progress should decisions need to be made. At this point I do not fully understand the HypnoBirthing process because I have yet to get Marie Mongan's book, this perspective has been adopted purely from the things I have read online.

I will be ordering my copy of the book shortly - just to get the learning started! I will be sure to write up my birth story once our little one arrives, I hope its a good as some of the birth stories I have read so far.

Useful information:
Hypno-Birthing.org
HypnoBirthing centre

Evening nibbles

I don't know if its pregnancy related or if I am just turning into a pig, I am positive you will see pictures of some if not all of these over the coming days!!!

But these Cheesey crackers look awesome and I think I may just have to make some tomorrow.

I would really like to try and make my own peanut butter like here, I think that its a lot healthier and probably better for baby.

I think that trying something like these Meatless burritos before the baby arrives would give me more options for freezer stocked food. That way we have healthy dinners but they are quick and cheap.

I also really wish I didn't have some frozen pastry sheets, I wish they were defrosted so I could make these lovely cheese straws.

Weeks 13 - 17

I am not big on sharing my pregnancy experiences so far because I believe its such a personal time. I think that everyone's is different and that its the difference that should be appreciated.

As I am now 18 weeks I feel comfortable sharing my growing belly - belly because it's not quite a bump just yet!!

13 weeks          14 weeks 

  

16 weeks         17 weeks

 

As you may notice, I completely forgot to take a picture in week 15. It was right when my hips were getting bad and I just didn't have the energy for anything!

My belly still isn't as tidy bump as I would have liked but as long as the baby is ok I am really not too worried!

I am starting to feel the flutters and weird wobbles that make me wonder if its indigestion or the baby. I love the thought of feeling him move around in there. I am looking forward to the bigger and stronger movements because I know that Andy will enjoy feeling what I have been feeling.

We have an appointment next week to see the baby again for its 19 week (omg) anomaly scan, this is the one where they could tell us what the gender of our baby is. We are not sure we would like to know, I find I have days where I really want to know to plan and get myself organised. But then I think that the surprise will keep us guessing and betting. I just don't know. What does it mean to know?! How does it change things for the pregnancy?!

Easter happiness

I am so lucky to have my mister I don't give him enough credit often enough for how much he does - especially with our little one on the way.

Our easter gift to each other was only small and was more about the joke as you can see below. He is just that lovely that he will play along with my silliness just to support me.

You probably remember that I call my mister my sunshine at times - that's why his is little mister :)

Love him.